There was a time when I liked nothing more than Election years. I remember the emery boards and bumper stickers given out for free at the County fair.

I remember 4th grade and being out on the playground, chanting a cheer for Kennedy.

“Kennedy, Kennedy, he’s our guy. K-E-N-N-E-D-Y!” 

There was probably more to it than that. Another few lines and a cartwheel at the end maybe. 

I’m not sure how I ended up on the Kennedy side. Unlike most of the kids on the playground, who were born into a solidly Republican or Democrat family, I had a choice early on. 

My dad was a union worker, originally from Chicago and the son of immigrants. He was a staunch Democrat. My mom’s roots, however, were in the small rural community where I grew up and where a Democrat winning the county was unheard of. She consistently voted Republican.  

It was a divide that led to interesting dinner conversations, but that never tore apart the fabric that held us together as a family     

My Democratic leanings strengthened over the years for reasons that had more to do with issues than Kennedy’s good looks and the charming pictures of his young family.

Still, there’s always been a certain respect for the people on the other side. One that, in fourth grade, allowed us to play friendly games of dodge ball after the final cartwheel. And, later, to have civil conversations over a beer as we watched returns roll in.   

Fifty years tell you that life doesn’t always change drastically with a new person at the helm. That change comes slowly and that, in most cases, the candidates are neither as good or as bad as you thought. That Supreme Court justices, with life-time appointments, can sometimes surprise you. That the checks and balances of a three-branch system of government are pretty good at keeping the train on track. That, ultimately, we’re all in this together.    

I’ve been both elated and disappointed in election years. But I don’t remember ever being afraid or disgusted.

This year feels different. I find myself living in Mexico, surrounded by people that the leading Republican candidate thinks should be kept in place with a wall. Whose response to people who disagree with him or who are feeling marginalized is, “Get them out of here! They’re bad people.”

There’s a stridency between the two Democrat candidates and their supporters that I don’t recall from earlier years and that makes me want to stay off the internet.

There’s little to suggest that we’re all in this together.

I’ll be heading back to that battlefield in time to watch the conventions and the final race to November. I should be looking forward to it.

Instead I find myself reminiscing about friendly games of dodge ball.